Sofie Klapow- Blog 3

Friendship is defined as an interpersonal relationship between two people that is mutually productive with mutual positive regard.  The tradition view on friendship state that friendship was fragile, however, the contemporary view on friendship states that it is flexible.  When comparing the two different views I would have to say that I agree more with the Flexible view of friendship. When I was leaving for college and had to say goodbye to all of my friends from home I was worried about what would happen to these friendships in the future.  I thought that because I wasn’t going to see them as often as usual our friendships would eventually fade out and we wouldn’t be as close.  This however wasn’t true, due to Facebook, video chatting and phone calls I was able to keep in touch and stay close with all almost all of my friends. When it comes to friendship geography no longer is an issue. As long as both parties are willing to continue a friendship CMC is a good replacement for face-to-face contact. Friendships will change and sometimes go through periods were the people are not as close but given time these friendships can go back to being close again.  This is something that has happened with one of my good friends and I, we sometimes will go through periods of time were we just aren’t as close but over time we start to communicate more and get closer. Friendships are not doomed just because of change or distance and CMC is something that has helped to further this idea of a flexible friendship.

Friendships are sometimes hard to maintain regardless of your distance to the other person. There are a few key maintenance strategies that should be used when trying to keep a friendship. These strategies include openness, providing support, positivity, and spending time together. I personally have had a few friendships end because one or more of these strategies wasn’t being fully utilized.  Within a friendship it is very important to be open with the other person. A Friendship is unable to continue if both people in the friendship don’t disclose important information about themselves. This information should include both breadth and depth.  One of the things I find most important in maintaining a friendship is providing support. Friends should be able to lean on each other in times of need. Another key strategy is positivity (reward).  Both parties in the friendship should be taking something away from this friendship. Most people won’t want to be in a friendship with someone if they aren’t getting anything out of it.  The final key maintenance strategy is spending time together. Spending time together is a way for you to get to know the other person better and get closer to them. A friendship can easily fall apart if you don’t spend anytime together. Some people use distance as an excuse not to spend time together but I think that CMC has provided ways for people to spend time together without actually being in the same room. Video chatting is one example of this. Spending time together is not the only maintenance strategy that can be achieved through CMC. All of these maintenance strategies are things that can be done over CMC. Friendships are very important and people should work hard to keep them.